Table of contents
- What is assertive communication skills?
- Benefits of assertive communication
- Few key points to remember
- Being assertive vs being aggressive
- How to get good with assertive communication skills?
- Being assertive in different situations
- Frequently asked questions
Have you ever felt bad for yourself for working too long because you are uncomfortable saying 'no'. You end up screwing your plans, routine as you were up late working for somebody. That's where assertive communication skills comes in handy.
Assertive communication means getting your feelings, thoughts,priorities well communicated without being disrespectful towards others. Being assertive makes you more confident, stronger. You can become more assertive by being honest, avoiding judgements and laying focus on your feelings.
Benefits of assertive communication
When you know that you have communicated yourself well you feel confident and respected.
- You develop trust with others.
- You feel less anxious.
- Your stress , anxiety reduces.
- You feel your boundaries are protected.
Tips and tricks to become better assertive communicator
To come across as an assertive communicator you will have to focus on few key points. This will will help you communicate yourself clear and better.
- Be respectful towards others feelings. Mind your tone and words while talking.
- Be simple and straight forward with your message. Beating round the bush is not helpful. Such activities will tarnish your image.
- Convey your opinions. Be crip, clear and confident with your opinions. Also, do not be rigid. Accept changes wherever possible with your opinions.
- Your body speaks more then words. Hold good body postures that conveys your confidence, honesty and strength. Do not look manipulative. Also remain respectful towards others opinions.
- Good eye contact should be maintained throughout a conversation. It helps you perceived as an honest person.
Be assertive not aggressive
Being assertive is different from being aggressive. This line is very fine. You must be very careful while being assertive. It is always confused with being aggressive. But being aggressive and passive is different. Being assertive is the middle ground between the two.
Those who are people pleaser, who cannot say "no" are often categorised as people with passive behaviour. Always looking after the needs of others ignoring owns needs causes lack of control over one's own life. This fills you with resentment and toxicity.
Talking about the aggressive people they often reflects the following Symptoms:
- They are disrespectful towards others opinions and emotions.
- They often violates others boundaries. It becomes fun for them.
- Always puts their own needs over others even if it hampers relationship.
How to get good with assertive communication skills?
Through practice you can become an assertive communicator. This skill will help you in all the areas of your life. Given below tips will help you get better with this skill.
- Set boundaries for yourself: you should set some firm boundaries not to be overstepped. This might feel uncomfortable for you at first but with practice it will become easy.
- Practice regularly: when someone breaches your boundary you should stand for it. At times when people may react violently but that is okay. Everyone will understand with time.
- Say "no" more often: prioritise your needs over others. After all you will have to take charge for your life. Doing additional work will gain you nothing other then tensions. Say "no" more often.
- Be confident
Being assertive in settings like:
- At work : it becomes important to communicate well in the professional settings otherwise you can be very easily be taken for granted either by your own colleagues or seniors. Good communication in professional settings also makes you come across as a capable candidate.
- In Familial settings: it is good keep yourself well communicated with the family members as well. This will bring you less troubles in several contexts.
- Amongst friends: when you do not entertain nonsense or unnecessary demands your friends often tend to demand from you you remain hassle free. You might come across as rude to them but healthy boundaries go long way for your good.
- Random people : it is also important to stick to your boundaries while talking to strangers in parks or clubs or anywhere. There are less chances for you to be taken for granted and you come across as a stronger person.
Assertive communication skills is ofcourse a skill if you do not possess much try to cultivate within you. This will make you grow strong and also fill you with confidence.
Read more: Benefits of journaling
Frequently asked questions:
Q.1. Is being assertive good for a job?
Yes assertive people make good leaders ,managers. They get things done by treating colleagues fairly and with respect. Assertive employees are often well-liked and are seen as colleagues that people want to work with.
Q.2.Are assertive people more successful?
It is often seen that all successful people atleast has one trait in common and that is 'assertiveness'.
Q.3.What is an assertive person?
Someone who is always ready to chase what they want. They are confident and able to express themselves clearly to others without any hesitation are called as assertive people. They keep their interest above others without being disrespectful towards them.
Q.4.Are we born assertive?
We all are born with this innate quality of assertiveness. Have seen babies? All of them cry, tantrums when you do not fulfilled their demands. They are least bothered about your capacity to fulfill any of their demands. This is the true nature of any being. But as we, we gradually adap our behaviour to fit in with the responses we receive from people.
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